Archive for the ‘Hurt Memories’ Category

Improve Self Confidence

17 May

Learn how to improve your most important asset – self confidence. Understand the reasons for the lack of self-confidence in order to utilise the techniques for gaining your confidence.

Self-confidence is your most important asset. It is both a clear understanding of what you can do and a clear vision of what you can become.

It is therefore the basis for belief : in yourself, in what you do and in the ideas and dreams that you have. To lack self-confidence is to frustrate this process.

What Is Self Confidence?

People often say “I need more self confidence!” without noting for what reason. It is important to realise that there is often a clear reason for the lack of self-confidence and it is usually experienced (a feeling of doubt, uncertainty or even dread!) in relation to a particular area.

To explain it in another way, no person is completely lacking in self-confidence. We all have our areas of expertise (even though we may deny that!). For example, a businessman who has spent many years understanding his customer’s needs and market place may become very wealthy and very successful, and as a result of his work, have great self-confidence in his ability to conduct his business. However, if he were asked to stand on stage and talk to 1000 people about the secret of his success, he may not now feel very confident!

Comfort ZonePerhaps he now lacks confidence because he does not know what to say or how to prepare a speech. Maybe he hasn’t had any experience in speaking in front of people or such a large crowd. Whatever the reason and despite his uncertainty, if he wants to speak in front a large audience and also believes he can do it, then he will!

From this example and your own experience it is easy to see that the feelings associated with a lack of self-confidence only arise when you anticipate your current ability to perform a particular task. Every day our self-confidence is being tested and requires continuous rebuilding. This is because in pursuing our goals and in experiencing life we are always being challenged to learn new things.

When you are learning something new you are expanding your “Comfort Zone” (which is your current level of expertise and self-confidence). There is always uncertainty – “Do I understand what has been explained to me?” When you are then asked to apply what you have just learnt there is always a learning curve as you convert what has been learnt into actual experience. We can sometimes feel at “risk” of making a “mistake”, or looking like a “fool”. We can also be afraid of not being able to meet other peoples’ high expectations, or worse still our own! The weight of these fears can be overwhelming to the point that a person will simply not attempt to do something new, which is a pity as the situation can quite easily be mastered when you know how.

Improving self-confidence is therefore something which can be achieved through applying and experiencing the following process:

  1. Having the desire to achieve a goal.
  2. Identifying what you need to learn.
  3. Applying what you have learnt.
  4. Receiving feedback (then if necessary going back to step 2).

Although it is important to identify and appreciate the process by which we gain self-confidence, it does not always help us with the real issue which is our reluctance to apply it!


Knowledge Centre – Life Changing

02 May

Why Is The Subconscious Mind Important?

The subconscious mind contains all our memory, our habits and beliefs, personality and self image. Perhaps you want to change a habit, such as smoking, or always reacting angrily when someone ‘pushes your buttons”. Maybe you wish to have better recall in exams. Or you might be challenged by low self esteem. Whatever you want to change, it is essential to change it in the subconscious mind.

But were you taught how to do that when you were at school? Were you born with a manual on how to operate your subconscious? Do you know the laws and the language of the subconscious mind? In my experience, most people answer ‘No” to those questions!

What Is The Subconscious Mind?

When you buy a computer, you acquire the hardware which is the computer screen, keyboard, disk drive and all the other bits and pieces inside. However, when you plug the computer in, it will not work without an “operating system”. The operating system is like a basic, predefined set of instructions which coordinates the use of the hardware. Once the operating system is installed, the computer comes to life and is able to perform fundamental tasks such as saving information, but more importantly, it is now able to accept further, more sophisticated programming. For instance, if you want your computer to type letters. A word processing (typing) program is required.

When you want to type a letter, you request the operating system to start this program. What then appears on the screen is a blank page, and as you type, the characters appear on the page. You may not be aware of all the billions of electronic signals which have been “programmed” by both the operating system and the word processing program to flow through the computer in a particular way so that you can type a letter. What you are consciously aware of is the image on the screen.


Overcome Depression

11 Jun

Are you seeking natural treatment of depression? Learn about the process of depression and how to overcome it.

What is definition of depression?

Depression has been described as a kind of emotional numbness.

A person may feel he or she has no laughter or joy inside because these positive emotions have been blocked by unhappy memories. Old emotional hurts inevitably lurk inside and when the new feelings try to bubble up they are filtered through these hurts. Even the most beautiful experience cannot survive if it is being filtered through a preexisting feeling of hopelessness, fear or anxiety.

How Do We Become Depressed?

Basically we are aroused by only two sensations, pain and pleasure. We all want to avoid pain and pursue pleasure. The emotional cycle which leads to depression begins in the present with our initial experience of pain or pleasure, and ends with complex feelings which are “remembered” exclusively in the past. This cycle of emotions has been found by psychiatrists to follow this pattern:

1. Pain in the present is experienced as hurt.
2. Pain in the past is remembered as anger.
3. Pain in the future is perceived as anxiety or fear.
4. Unexpressed anger, redirected against yourself and held within, is experienced as guilt.
5. The depletion of energy that occurs when anger is redirected inward creates depression.

Hurt is stored because the body retains a primitive subconscious ability to remember every incident that it experiences. 7. This is called conditioning and is part of the way we learn.

Although many people are treated with anti depressant drugs, these medications do not cure the underlying hurt or sadness that is the true cause of the depression. When the medication is taken away the depression usually reappears.

Even though it can take longer and requires greater insight and courage, a depressed person can either release the inner hurt or reprogram it. He/She can learn new, more useful and effective responses to painful experiences. When this is accomplished a permanent cure usually results.

In the Life Skills Seminar you learn to overcome depression by understanding and practising:

1. The conscious ability to relax and release stress any time, anywhere.
2. The ability to focus the mind.
3. The ability to neutralise or reprogram subconscious “hurt memories”.
4. The ability to develop mind/body exercises to overcome depression.
5. The ability to develop new responses to current experiences.